Did You Just Call Me the “D” Word?
By: David Freund, Chief Leadership Officer

I’m sorry, but there is no way I am or have ever been a diminisher!  I value people far too much to ever fall into that trap. My goal is to enlarge people and help them grow so they can reach their full potential. I am what Liz Wiseman calls a multiplier.          

Well, at least that’s the way I thought I was coming across.

Last year at Live2Lead, Liz talked about accidental diminishers, and I saw an entirely new version of me. Yes, I need to admit that I was an accidental diminisher.

Perhaps the best place to start is to give you a simple definition: A multiplier is a person who works to bring out the best in others. They have high expectations for their team members and act as the encourager. Multipliers challenge their team to achieve greater results and practice higher levels of thinking. Conversely, a diminisher is someone who shuts people down and ends up holding them back. The great danger is when we aren’t even aware that we have become a diminisher. Here are three of the six accidental diminisher behaviors that Liz Wiseman identified in her research:

• Idea Guy – You are the person that runs in with new ideas all the time. You read an article, hear a podcast, and you are ready to share it with everyone. The problem is, you are actually shutting people down rather than inspiring them. They start to wait for your ideas rather than think for themselves. To counteract this tendency, just ask more questions. It’s that simple, just ask great questions.
• Always On – You are the Energizer You have answers for everyone’s questions. In most situations, you speak too soon and say too much. Your energy level is so high that you dominate the office. To counteract this tendency, carry around four poker chips in your pocket. Each time you speak move a chip to the other pocket. When the chips are gone, you’re done for the day. Play your chips carefully.
• Rescuer – You wait for someone to need your help and then you rush in because you can solve the problem. In reality, you are the problem and the team isn’t thinking anymore, and they have become conditioned to let you solve everything. Rather than solve the problems, give them back to the team with some tools to help solve them.

I never knew that I was an accidental diminisher. It goes against everything that I believe in, and yet I fell into several of the traps. By learning these behaviors, you too can engage the proper tools and move from a diminisher to a multiplier.

Please join Marisa and me on The Next Page podcast as we explore all six of the accidental diminisher behaviors and the tools to counter act them.

Gratitude
By: David Freund

Have we lost the ability to be grateful? Have we as a nation lost perspective? Have we forgotten how truly blessed we are?

My mom and her parents fled Europe as the winds of war began to blow in the late 1930s. As a seven-year-old, she recalls going to the butcher shop near their home and asking the butcher for a nickel’s worth of bologna, sliced thin. She also shared that dinner was often one piece of meat, cooked in fat. The meat was for my grandfather. My mom, aunt, and grandmother would dip a slice of bread in the drippings. They were poor, but you would never hear them say that. They were always grateful for the blessings they had rather than musing about the things they did not. My grandmother was one of the most grateful people I have ever met. What did she know that we do not?

Intentionally focusing on being grateful has a tremendous impact on every aspect of our lives.  According to Amit Amin of Happierhuman.com, a study showed that a daily five-minute gratitude journal practice could increase your well-being by more than 10%. That is the same impact as doubling your income. He went on to add that gratitude makes us healthier. We have fewer ailments, less pain, more sleep, and the sleep we have is of a higher quality. Amin identified 31 benefits of having an attitude of gratitude ranging from personal happiness to increased productivity and career advancement.

A 2015 Newsweek article by Douglas Main reported that grateful people are not only healthier, but more hopeful. Athletes who expressed more gratitude toward their coaches had greater self-esteem. The article also noted grateful people tend to be more empathetic.

So how does it work? Well, my grandmother lingered over life’s blessings. It was that simple; she spent time reflecting on the blessings she had in her life. She would have had plenty to complain about, but she chose not to. She lived in the moment and didn’t dwell in the past or long for some future time. Being grateful allowed her to leave fear behind, even though a totalitarian regime took her father and brother away, never to be seen again.  As long as I was blessed to have her in my life, she was a joyful person. She was one of those people who brightened any room she entered.

The best way to cultivate gratitude is to keep a gratitude journal. You are combining the benefit of reflection and journaling with the intentional act of creating a more positive mindset. Next week is Thanksgiving. Why not give it a try over the next week and let me know how you make out. You will not regret it. I promise!